Is “Fandom Etiquette” the New “Whites Only”?

Twitter user trixxked (AKA Trix) had an interesting thing to say about fandom etiquette when they posted to their Twitter on the 26th of July, 2026. Trix, a Haitian/Soulaan creator with varied fandom interests, quote retweeted user niggaayaoi (why did you make me type that?) who’d stated, “I hate fandom etiquette and I hate ao3” with an add-on statement: “Fandom etiquette is just the white queer way to keep biPOC/POC and anyone darker than a paper bag in our self proposed corner // Despite fandom being built on the backs of black people and other POC” [sic]. As we all know by now, this kind of exploration is one of my absolute favorites because there are great points to be made here and sometimes it takes a little bit of softness from a white person to get them into white spaces and help sift through the thought processes enough to do some real work. Yeah, I’m going to say in some cases that Trix is wrong, but Trix isn’t wrong, and that’s the meat of the thing. Get your trowels and archeological tools because folks, we’re gonna dig in.

Trix is young. On her carrd she lists herself as a minor and it does show in some ways, but despite those, she’s got something here. Trix would hate me. Doesn’t matter. In fact, it makes my points agreeing with her hold a significant amount of meaning for people she might not expect to attract with her rhetoric. The important thing here is to maintain a conversation that we’re having among ourselves. Trix doesn’t have any answers for us and nor should she be expected to have any; she’s done her part and we’re gonna pick at it as much as we possibly can.

Underneath Trix’s post, other POC Twitter users chimed in with their agreement. One user stated, “fandom etiquette is genuinely some white people bullshit glad u said it.” [sic] and Trix’s reply included, “[…] they […] would rather lick the bottom of a peak covid nurses shoe than call out racism or misogynoir”. Another user mentioned in a response to the original tweet, “The only censorship they care about is their child rape fanfiction not the censorship toward oppressed minorities” [sic]. Meanwhile, the AO3 subReddit community expressed confusion with tidbits like “[…] I really don’t think that the concept of fanfiction or being a fan of something is built off ‘the backs of non-whites’.” and “As a poc I’m so confused right now lmao. There are genuinely so many things that were built on the backs of minorities… but fandom? Idk, I don’t see it? Am I missing something?” Digging even further, Reddit user 1Q-91 added, “They’re literally just parroting progressive talking points without actually understanding what they’re saying. But they like to whip phrases like this out to weaponize them and give their nonsense moral backing.” and TeaWithCarina replied thoughtfully, “Often a thought-terminating cliché, yeah. Just something they’ve seen that ‘wins’ arguments.”

But…what is fandom etiquette? Generally speaking, it’s a social guardrail that provides a way for interactions to flow smoothly within certain situations. Within fandom, etiquette is usually whittled down to the most basic of its structure, including the old adages of “Don’t Like, Don’t Read” and “Unsolicited Criticism is Considered Rude.” There are other little tidbits that will pop up here and there, like how to respond to author notes or how to handle it if someone has blocked you on the Archive. The usage of bookmarks and the public nature of the comments received there can sometimes be added into this, making fandom etiquette a little more complex than some might think, but it all comes back around to a similar theme: “Writers are writing for free and if you think it’s free poop, you don’t have to eat it.”

The argument becomes that these social guardrails prevent meaningful conversations that could be had about racism within fandom communities which is absolutely true. It is nearly impossible to have a meaningful conversation with people who should be involved in it when the general culture of fandom spaces disallows for those conversations to occur naturally in the places that would be most visible, such as the comments below each chapter. There are work-arounds, naturally, as we can have plenty of conversations about unnamed but specific enough fics on the AO3 subReddit to have a constructive discourse, but even there we can find pushback and roadblocks that can be common in any predominantly white-led spaces where the preservation of “comfort” overrides the drive for equity and inclusion. Because of this natural (and it is natural and observed time and time again) human drive to preserve comfort and normalcy, rocking the boat even with a calm and level tone can cast any Black “instigator” as the “Angry Black” stereotype and conjure a certain level of defensiveness among predominantly white groups.

This is where I come in. After all, Trix’s points are…kinda wrong. But as I said before, she isn’t wrong. On a fundamental level, the sentiment behind her frustration is based in something very real. Yes, she meant to say “self-imposed” rather than “self proposed” and no, fandom was not “built on the backs of black people and other POC” (fandom has always been a primarily white endeavor and though many things have roots in Black cultures or subcultures, fandom’s origins are almost embarrassingly white). Still—etiquette has long been a tool that not only provides a guardrail to ease interaction, has also been maliciously wielded to subjugate a subset of people often considered “lower.” Being unable or unwilling to abide by etiquette has often been the mark of a savage, cutting off opportunities that otherwise might have been available had they only “followed the rules.” Those rules are also sometimes viciously applied. Early on in my ao3 years, I discovered a quite poorly-written work that was massively popular but was based in the United Kingdom by a presumably British author who wrote their Middle Eastern male characters with an almost feral, abusive nature; so much so that it was viscerally unsettling for me. Curious as to their rationale, I asked about it and I was told that I was mistaken and how dare I accuse the author of such a faux pas in their own comments…didn’t I know that wasn’t allowed within fandom’s etiquette?

Sometimes racism manifests in manners that are harder to notice and become ubiquitous in ways white people wouldn’t usually be able to qualify. Reddit user RedLineSamosa used a theoretical example of the way Black or POC readers might be alienated within a fandom by popular headcanons such as “shoplifter!protagonist” where our protag is Afro-Latino, building off of a racial stereotype that an urban character of a certain background would casually shoplift. White readers may not even see this tag or this headcanon simply because they’re not in those places on AO3 because they don’t read fics that feature that character. RedLineSamosa went on to describe other incidents that can underscore the sometimes hidden ways that racism can manifest that we may not be privy to simply because we’re not looking or because racism is so baked into our wider culture, we hadn’t had the wherewithal to recognize it.

If we think about the fact that racism is so ingrained within our society and psyche, it can get really uncomfortable to reckon with the feelings that notion can invoke and can lead to a complete mental shut-down. It’s important not to retreat back into the shell of comfort, or at least spend more time out of it than inside it. There’s very little that an individual person can do to combat the ways that racism infiltrates systems and manifests in the shadows of things that otherwise should be innocuous (like fandom etiquette), but being aware and being able to have these difficult conversations without brushing them off wholesale is important. Trix’s post might actually be a thought-ending cliché and her entire meaning behind her anger might be that white people are perverts who should have their books burned, but the real challenge and the real impact is on us. It’s not about how something is said, it’s about what is being said even if the original messaging is sloppy or imperfect. In fact, being sloppy and imperfect is completely normal and should be expected when it comes to emotional topics like this, but our interpretation of these issues and how we can approach them with an open heart, logic, and reason is what really matters.

Am I advocating for chaos, disorder, and utter anarchy with the abandonment of fandom etiquette? No. That’s just not the answer. What I will advocate for, however, is a willingness to think critically about the way that certain systems can and do provide their own versions of thought-ending clichés or guardrails that can become limitations on what speech is “allowed” where. Though we can moderate our own comment sections, it’s worth it to hear out people who think differently than us and it’s worth it to encourage that kind of freedom in the first place. Yes, there are going to be ill-meaning actors out there, but it’s imperative not to dismiss everyone as a bad actor right off the bat just because they’ve said something that might not make sense to you at first or might have some elements that are just plain wrong. We’ve got big reader brains, and it’s a big deal to be able to exercise them with challenges like these.

My call to action here is not to upend an entire functional social tool but to keep in mind that sometimes etiquette can be brushed aside in order to introduce concepts that could benefit the fandom community as a whole. Much like Diogenes was invited to grand parties to stir up shit, maybe it really is worth it to have the fandom cynics around to rake up our muck and provoke conversations around topics that are uncomfortable or disturbing. It doesn’t mean anything’s going to always come out of that discussion, but a thoughtful probing of these concerns can make small differences that will add up over time. Perhaps talking about how alienating a shoplifter!protag headcanon is can make writers think twice before they utilize it. It’s not through shame or the threat of cancellation but through a genuine thoughtful consideration of the reasons that headcanon existed and the reasons it should be retired. Shame can only go so far and cancellation can oftentimes backfire into a descent toward the opposition so the clear and effective way to create a solid ground under a change like this is to foster understanding on a deep and abiding level.

Education is the key, and many times it’s up to white people to introduce our friends, neighbors, or fandoms, to these concepts with thoughtful approaches that encourage living with and handling our own discomfort in ways we haven’t considered before. The AO3 subReddit has so far been a good place for these conversations to occur, providing a decent space for a respectful back-and-forth which—for the most part—fosters understanding and cooperation on a deeper level than most other platforms can provide. Say what you will about Redditors, the AO3 subReddit has really impressed me with their willingness to have these difficult conversations and allow everyone a chance to learn and grow within fandom. There may be some folks out there who can’t leap over some hurdles but I think a healthy dialogue is possible in almost every case. As a functional and kind-hearted group of creators and readers, I know a better world is possible.

(Now, if the racism is a kink thing…just remember to tag it. I beg. Much love to all my freaky girlies, gentlies, and enbies. Yes, I am a pervert, and no I do not make exceptions.)